The Runaway

First off, I’m a wretched blogger for being so absent! Things have been crazy busy. But that is neither here nor there…
But now, a story.
My vision has been hazy all morning and I don’t know what’s up with it. I had Lasik a few years ago and things have been totally fine since. I really hope my bionic vision won’t stay on the fritz for long.

Anyway, the big excitement of the morning was a runaway Ford Focus hatchback! OMG! I was parking my car and I noticed the little red hatchback pull up next to me. As I was gathering my things I noticed a blur of red out of the corner of my eye. I thought the guy driving it must be straightening out the car or something. Then I noticed the car was awfully quiet. Then I thought my eyes were just playing tricks on me…because I couldn’t see the driver. Then I realized that the driver of the car was walking away and the car was quite close to hitting him. So then I yelled, “Dude! Your car!” He turned around and then I noticed he was walking with a cane. And I was like OH SHIT! The guy threw his cane down and tried to stop the runaway car, but he’s no Superman, he’s closer to House. So that was totally ineffective. Luckily the car ran into a curb and stopped on its own…narrowly avoiding my car and the dozens of others and the lady who was standing nearby. The guy said he didn’t know how to drive a manual and he’d borrowed the car from a friend. He hopped back in and reparked it. I really hope he set the parking break this time…

Coincidentally, my old Infiniti was struck in an accident very similar to this several years ago. My sorority sister’s Mustang rolled out of her driveway, pushed her roommate’s Jeep, and the two barreled into my poor little car down the street.


And, I still feel a little bit blind. I should probably avoid the computer for the day. But I think that’s impossible.

Posted in Introductions | 1 Comment

Stupid Things People Say

I’m sure we could all compare stories of how many stupid people we encounter in our everyday lives.  Since this is my blog, I am going to take the spotlight for now.

Yesterday I talked to two well-meaning (I’m sure) students.  They said all sorts of ridiculous things, but it got me questioning again what I’m doing with my life.  Generally I love advising students, but sometimes I wonder if what I do will make a difference with people like this:

Girl Friday:  (in a calming voice) It’s ok that you don’t know what job you want after college, but close your eyes and tell me what is the biggest thing you could dream for yourself.

Student 1:  I see myself homeless.  I think I’d like that.

Girl Friday:  (incredulous) Honey, you don’t need a college degree if you want to be homeless.

Student 1:  I mean I don’t want to have a home.  I want to travel.

Girl Friday:  Ok, have you considered studying abroad?

Student 1:  No, I definitely don’t want to study abroad.

Girl Friday:  (confused) You want to travel but you don’t want to take the opportunity to study and travel at the same time…?

The conversation went on like this for some time.  It ended on this cherry:

Student 1:  I don’t want to be one of those people who works in an office and does boring stuff all day and leads a meaningless life.  I feel sorry for those people.

Girl Friday:  (examines her tiny office and stacks of boring paper) So basically you don’t want to end up like me–

Student 1: –Not like you!  I mean…

She suffered from a true case of foot in mouthitis.

My next conversation came on the heels of that train wreck…

Student 2:  So, I noticed that your program is small, does that mean it’s not competitive since no one wants to be in it?

Girl Friday:  (inward groan)  Aren’t these the kind of things you ask Admissions before applying?  (feeling rather put out already)  You shouldn’t be judging our program based on the student class size, in fact, being small is a good thing!  Have you considered the quality of the teaching faculty?  That is more important than how many students we admit.

Student 2:  I think a lot of guys try to get admitted into Women’s Studies because they think it’s funny.

Girl Friday:  I think your friends are joking with you.  What prospective student would do something that inane?

Student 2:  (laughs insipidly) …

And curtain!

So there you have it.  Two people who live their lives carelessly and say whatever comes to mind.  Well, it’s my turn now.

You suck.  Like majorly.

Posted in Office Stories | 1 Comment

A Place for Memories

My parents are selling their house, well, my childhood home, to be more specific.  A house isn’t just a place for your stuff, it’s a place for memories.

On our first Easter there were red tulips, yellow daffodils, and purple irises in the front yard.  We had a rock box in the back yard because my dad is a neat freak and didn’t want us tracking in sand.  I had pool parties every year for my birthday.  I can’t imagine how many hot dogs and hamburgers have been consumed on that patio.

In junior high I made an ideal babysitter because I was centrally located in the neighborhood.  I could walk myself to and from my jobs.  My dad would deliver me a meal on wheels.  I never really liked SpaghettiO’s and my mother always insisted that I eat salad with every dinner.

My high school girlfriends who lived across town benefitted from my knowledge of where all the boys in my neighborhood lived. (The cute ones and the not so cute ones.)  My front drive way was the scene of a few awkward almost-sort-of-pseudo first dates.

There’s a piano in the living room that sits and mocks me because I haven’t mastered my chords. There’s a trace of the aqua paint in my bathroom that turned out to be a spectacularly bad idea.  My boxes of diaries, postcards, newspaper clippings, old pointe shoes and tutus just won’t fit in at this new place. I’m convinced.

I’m afraid that there will be no trace of the family—of the girl that became Girl Friday—that loved that place for 21 years when we finally say good bye.

casa friday

Posted in Homegirl, Life | 1 Comment