The Diary of Girl Friday

Lately I’ve been trying to escape.  Whether it is through my window at work or in my head when I’m vegging out on the couch, I have this urge to flee.  Last week Lucky 10-Key and I discussed fictitious travel plans.  On the top of my list is Jupiter.  If and when space travel becomes a quick FTL jump away, I fully intend on visiting that gorgeous planet.  The swirling colors hypnotized me as a child, and I have to admit, they still do.  Second on my list, and only slightly more plausible, is a trip to Iceland.  It’s the birthplace of Björk and safe enough for mothers to leave their babies outdoors–unattended–for a few hours of chilly air (how else do you think Björk developed those set of pipes?).  Since I can’t actually afford to take a trip and I’m on probation at work until June, I have to settle for taking a vacation of the mind.

I can get caught up in my vivid imagination for hours at a time.  It takes me places I never even knew I wanted see.  I worry over words like a pebble in the palm of my hand.  Suddenly, my apartment is too small to contain me; the idea that it ever could seems absurd.  I’m a Superheroine for Gods sakes!  I know my path to becoming the Superheroine of All Things New and Exciting is just beginning, but I can’t wait to see what it’s like along the way.

I feel like all of my Gal Pals are on the verge of something big—like a rubber band pulled taught—the tension propelling us further than we ever expected.  If you aren’t waking up scared out of your mind, restless, and reckless—then you’re doing something wrong.

Anaïs Nin said, “It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before… to test your limits… to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

So place your bets ladies, because sometimes you just have to roll a hard six.

So after being ridiculously sad about the state of my lunch, I got back to my office only to discover my lovely boss had bought me Animal Fries from In N Out.  If you aren’t a foodie or from California, you might not know that these fat laden fries are a true delicacy—In N Out fries topped with their special sauce, grilled onions, and American cheese.  The office smelled deliciously potent all afternoon, but it was so worth it.  Thanks Boss Man! 

At what point in my life did eating lunch become a chore?  I remember scores of lunches underneath trees, my jeans getting damp from the impromptu picnic, my ankles itching from the blades of grass that pricked the strip of skin between my sock and my leg.  I played House under the walnut trees with Lucky 10-Key.  I tested out being a disillusioned thirteen year-old with English Diva.  I swapped magazines and tapes of Buffy with Notorious M.A.G.  Now I wander around the grounds debating on what gourmet meal I will heat up in the microwave.  Will it be a teriyaki chicken rice bowl or a Hot Pocket?  I long ago gave up the notion of getting up early to make a sack lunch.  The thought of eating a sandwich in solitary was too much to bear.  I used to rally my spirits in between classes with shameless flirting and gossip.  Now I walk around with an iPod and hope to be mistaken for a student on her way somewhere and not a twenty-something lone luncher.  What figuratively eats at me is how quickly life can change.  I used to eat out every lunch hour.  The BF would trek the fifteen miles to my vicinity, but gas and budgetary concerns necessitated some cut-backs.  Then I became the “social director” of my small office, and invitations to lunch required The Rules-like diligence.  I accepted lunch invitations for Friday no later than Wednesday.  I was on the VIP list of Ladies that Lunch!  Then Nancy K. broke her arm.  She can barely make it to work, much less restaurant hop.  Then Suzie Q. left for a business trip.  I won’t event tell you how much that sucks on so many levels.  The only one left on the list is Julia J., and I think I’d rather eat glass than eat with her again. She’s one of those people that proclaim to dislike all things cool. I guess I would too if I was as tiresome as her.

Instead of dwelling on my lack luster menu today, I decided to be productive and write to you instead.  Yet, even in the computer lab I can’t shake the longing for a real lunch with my Gal Pals!