For the past couple of days Girl Friday has been irreverently assisting a local nonprofit organization with a truly cheesy fundraiser for a worthy cause. While the assorted staff members milled about in their business casual outfits (emphasis on the cas), Girl Friday single handedly alphabetized color-coded cards, and with her death ray eyes matched five names to nine faces.
Kathy A.: The Boss
Kathy B.: Admin. Assistant I
Khrystyl: The Snob with the Stupid Name
Crystal: The Intern with the Crazy Expensive Pants
Rochelle: Admin. Assistant II
Rachele: The Sassy Blonde
Cary: The Chubby (boy) Telemarketer
Keri: The Short (girl) Telemarketer
Hank: The Boy Who Secretly Lives Out of His ’88 Accord
Girl Friday spotted Hank while she walked (begrudgingly) the three blocks to the office (no parking perks even for Superheroines). Girl Friday felt bad for Hank so she reserved her razor sharp comments (ok, inner thoughts) for Khrystyl. Girl Friday wondered if Khrystyl’s parents were on acid when they named their poor daughter. By the end of the assignment, Girl Friday determined that in spite of her parents’ attempt at raising a unique individual, Khrystyl was a rather dim, self-centered, and conceited witch (with a capital B).
Girl Friday put her dignity on the line, yet again, when The Boss asked her to work at the fundraiser dressed as a Cowgirl. “It’s a Western Round Up,” she said. Girl Friday asked if she could wear jeans. The Boss was not pleased. It may have been a Western theme but it wasn’t Friday. Girl Friday, being a Superheroine and all, had more important things to do than plan the perfect outfit and makeup palette (unlike the Crazy Rich Intern and the Snob with the Stupid Name). On the appointed day, Girl Friday dressed in khakis and a checkered shirt. Yee-haw! Girl Friday was pleased with her attempt but her ego was tragically deflated when the rest of the staff showed up looking like they raided the closet on the set of Coyote Ugly. Their take on the Western theme was Western Dominatrix/Hooker Chic. Girl Friday just took her seat and tri-folded pamphlets until The Boss switched her to stamping envelopes.
Tomorrow, Girl Friday is off to rescue another desperate office in need of a dose of Superheroine morale. Girl Friday sincerely hopes that dressing up/role playing is not required (unless it’s at time and a half pay, of course).