I was a sleepy girl last night! Sorry for the delay in posting! I just couldn’t keep my eyes open to edit It’s All in the Swag yesterday.
There is nothing quite so appealing as the prospect of freebies. No matter how rich people get, they’re always on the lookout for complimentary items. Even Oprah admitted that she is compelled by gift with purchase offers.
The fact that we all know to be true, but refuse to voice, is that these supposed goodies aren’t always that great. For example a few years ago I got my first and only pieces of MAC makeup in a Hamptons soiree swag bag. I adore the plain beige eye shadow—Llama—but detest the Lip Glass—Pink Lemonade. I try on the hideous lip-gloss once a year in the hopes that my skin tone will have changed to peaches and cream. I can’t bear to throw the tube away even though I know very well I’ll never be able to wear it.
I’m going to a Fragrance Festival today with Latte Lady. We both paid 10 bucks for a spot at the event and in return we get a ten-dollar coupon and a gift bag. We were so excited about the gift bags that we both bought extra tickets so we could send our BFFs a bag, too! The kicker is that these gift bags are supposed to be a bonus for attending the festival, not the sole reason for attending.
Suzie Q was so excited about my gift bag observations that I made a little how-to list…
Something wearable—either a t-shirt or scarf with a logo representing the event
A couple magazines relating to the theme or the location of the event
A few bottles or cans of an obscure drink product, preferably something trendy like tea drinks or fruit juices
An assortment of hoity-toity snack foods like Blue Potato Chips, bittersweet chocolate because sugar is so out, and a newfangled energy bar
Some sort of promotional gift certificate worth at least $100 to an über-trendy store where the cheapest things to buy are Stella McCartney jeans
Random samples of perfume and body products, preferably something with the words anti-wrinkle or as good as Botox on the package
An array of makeup items in phased-out or unpopular shades that the wearer will love all the same because of the pretty packaging
Enjoy!
Currently playing: Everything but the Girl, Wrong
The rain finally stopped and the sun was out like it had never been gone at all. I enjoyed the view from my office all day long. It’s tucked away on a picturesque plot of land nestled between the mountains and the ocean. I am privileged not just because of the prime location, but because this piece of heaven has so many things I love.
A lot of the residents are foreigners and helping them never stops being fascinating. They have awesome accents, they indulge me in stories about their far off countries, and they delight me with their intrigue over America. Michael, the sweetest of the Swedes, was exasperated with his American friends who didn’t understand the beauty of the Grand Canyon. Apparently his country’s landscape is made of snow and pine trees? Simon, who wore his too cute rugby jersey, lost his keys and was so happy for the spare I gave him that he said, “Brilliant!” Linda brought in Cadbury Dairy Milk–Fruit and Nut for Dave. Lucky for me he’s one of those boys concerned with his girlish figure, so I got to eat most of it. Why can’t stores stock Cadbury year round? It’s like a party in my mouth!
Don’t get me started on all the long, sordid phone calls I am privy to hearing! The pay phone is right outside my office and the foreigners are on it all day long. I heard Simon whispering sweet nothings to his girl across the pond! My coworker Suzie Q is also lulled into a trance-like state, but not always by foreign tongues; she inhales the potent second hand smoke of foreign cigarettes…
When I’m not busy people watching and eavesdropping (and working), I’m spying out the window for a glimpse of wild rabbits, the giant White Heron, and George and Gracie (our favorite Mallards). Even The Pink Fairy couldn’t pry her eyes away from a chipmunk when she came to visit! On my roughest days I look for bunny rabbits frolicking in a flower patch.
Unfortunately, not all offices are created equally. You might be stuck in a concrete building with a bunch of wankers. Never fear! There are things you can do to lift your spirits at work, too! You could meditate and find inner peace; but if that’s too complicated you could visit the forums, decorate your cubicle with pictures of puppies and kittens, take a hit of your favorite perfume, escape to the nearest drug store for chocolate and makeup, sneak off for a cup o’joe, or listen to a pretty boy sing about Everything Zen! It’s your choice!
Currently playing: It’s Like 1999, a custom mix by The Pink Fairy