I’m having one of those days where I just want to bang my head up against the wall. I wouldn’t want to mess up all the knowledge I’ve gleaned over the years by making my brain a pile of goo, but then I’d have an excuse for not being able to update my department’s website. It sounds like a pleasant solution at the moment.
I compare web developing to flying a plane. If your boss said, “I need you to fly this plane. Go to this class for two hours, and then come back and pick me up in the plane around 5 PM. I’m counting on you,” you’d think he or she was bonkers. And yet this is what my boss is asking me to do. Everyone is counting on me to fix the website. I told them I was confident I could do it when I interviewed—but that was when I was under the impression there’d be some sort of lessons and support. What I have gotten was a useless class and a jumble of duplicate web files that lead me down a rabbit hole…
I am not a quitter. I hold on to the bitter end of things, and usually I come out okay. But this job, this project, Dreamweaver, this website, is playing a game of chicken with me and I’m afraid I’m going to be the loser. The thought of not mastering this frightens me.
Also, my other looming project is the department brochure. I cannot locate the file (everyone claims it is here, but I have searched and searched to no avail) so I may just have to start from scratch. The newsletter also needs to get produced. And like I don’t have enough thorns in my side reminding me, but today some salesman (and I use man loosely since he was all of 22) dropped by the office and tried to flirt his way into a printing deal. I couldn’t believe how he batted his eyelashes at my student clerk and tried to charm me with his talk of price breaks and mad printing skillz. Whatever, dude. Your cheap cologne and exposed chest muscles may work in some places, but I work in Women’s Studies and I see right through your ridiculous ploy of using your sexuality to make sales. You hussy!