I Just Work Here

Posted on July 9, 2006 by Girl Friday

I am feeling rather accomplished tonight.  I took care of some odious tasks like buying a new vacuum filter, cleaning the stove burners, and decluttering my desk.  I went a marketing on Saturday morning with Julia J.  I bought “sexy lettuce” on the advisement of the lettuce lady and I made Yukon Gold mashed potatoes.  I’m like a smug-married (minus the married).  I even managed to write this weekend!  Shocker!  I also caught up on Hex and finished watching Deadwood season 2.

It seems crazy, but I think I am getting the hang of this working stiff lifestyle.  Now if I could just manage getting to work on time and staying composed in the face of annoying a-holes…

Considering my overall lack of patience, I really think starting a career in the Administrative Arts was a spectacularly bad idea.  I think I confuse people with my otherwise cheery disposition.  I am all too happy to organize potlucks, go on coffee runs, and chitchat at the water cooler.  My enthusiasm wanes, however, when idiots call, when imbeciles enter the office, and when illiterates (aka students) require my help.

Notice I never equate work with fulfillment…?

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“But You Don’t Have a Prada Backpack”

Posted on July 6, 2006 by Girl Friday

I watched The Devil Wears Prada last night.  Apparently I’m not the first girl to fall into a job in the Administrative Arts.  Too bad my job doesn’t come with a closet full of couture that I can pick through at my leisure.  Also too bad that a size six is now a size fourteen.  Wait, does that make the reverse true?  A size fourteen is a size six.  Yes, sounds like logic to me.  (What are the implications for Caprica!Six?  Discuss amongst yourselves…)

I can’t believe I forgot to mention I’m going to see THE DRESDEN DOLLS!!!!!!! I got tickets for the end of July in San Francisco! I haven’t been to a concert in so long—in fact I could probably list them on two hands—Alanis Morissette, Bush, No Doubt (all three with The Pink Fairy), 311, A Perfect Circle, and Unwritten Law.  Anyway, I love Amanda Palmer’s lyrics. She sprinkles the F-word liberally (Shhh!  Don’t tell my mom!) like Liz Phair (Used to? I haven’t listened to her latest) and talks about S-E-X. If you can’t be dirty in music, then where can you?

I’m no Rachel Ray.  I hosted a couple of friends for a Fourth of July barbeque.  I can’t do everything in 30 minutes and I suck at being bubbly and making up cute acronyms.  My annoying neighbors partied from noon until 9 PM.  One of their guests showed off her prominent plumbers’ crack and I had an interesting vantage point from my balcony.  When the obnoxious neighbors came up to introduce themselves to me on my patio I asked myself, What Would Starbuck Do?  The only answer I could come up with was to punch my neighbors.  Against my better judgment, I ran the other way and boiled inwardly. 

I think that’s it on the randomness front.  I’m off.  Damn, I forgot to wear my trusty cardigan.  Now I won’t have the desired effect of my cape blowing briskly as I fly off to solve Some Great Payroll Problem…

Currently playing on the radio:  Snow Patrol, Chasing Cars

Eyes Open

Posted in Life, Random | 1 Comment

If It’s Not One Thing, It’s Your Mother

Posted on June 29, 2006 by Girl Friday

I’ve been trying to write something fabulous and witty, but I’m coming up dry.  This emotional roller coaster of a week has really drained me of my normally coherent thought process.  Instead, silliness is running a muck!  I spent the better part of the afternoon playing my own verison of Mad Libs with Lucky 10-Key!  Thanks for the distraction…  Here are the wonderful fictitious lives we created.  Enjoy!

1.  Once upon a time there was a girl named Michele.  She dreamed of visiting Rome.  She worked really hard at being the prettiest reading teacher at her school.  In her spare time she loved to eat ravioli and do crossword puzzles.  Even though she had a lot of make-up, she still had aspirations of hiking places and swimming in a luxurious bathtub all day long and meeting the man of her dreams.  One day she struck it rich when she sold her banal collection of hair spray and cell phones on E-bay.  She moved to Rome and found work as a professional seamstress for Prada.  She bought an ugly place and fixed it right up with a few coats of black and green paint.  She was so pretty and since she slept so much and walked everywhere she was very healthy and it showed in her face.  Everywhere she went in Rome men swooned and women were envious.  One fine day she met her own Doctor McDreamy and they ate ravioli everyday and lived happily ever after in their black and green house.

2.  While visiting your pastry chef friend Michele in Paris, you decide to do a little shopping for some new paintings.  You decide that the painting must match your brand new fuchsia settee.  While perusing the gallery, you bump into Colin Firth who thought he was walking into a bookstore. “It must be fate!” he declares to you upon your meeting.  You have a whirlwind romance and run to NYC to elope, but at the alter you decide not to marry Colin.  You just aren’t sure. So you move in with your dear friend Megan, the aspiring clothes designer, for awhile to figure things out and write in your journal.  Megan vows to get you out of your funk, so the two of you embark on a journey to Iceland.  While at the local night club, Slate, dancing the night away, you spy a model-like piano player, who is, coincidentally named Jamie Bamber.  You and your Jamie spend the entire night drinking coffee and feeding each other chocolate – aphrodisiac city!  After this night, you never think of Colin again…

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