The Diary of Girl Friday

She is not! You take that back!

In response to Girl Friday’s well wishers, she’d just like to remind y’all that she doesn’t own rose colored glasses—in fact, she just had Lasik and wears no ocular enhancements of any kind. Girl Friday is a realist, sometimes a fatalist, always a worrier, and very rarely an optimist. Life has proven that it enjoys kicking Girl Friday’s ass right when she expects rainbows and puppies.

Case in point, November 1, 2004:
Girl Friday’s first week at a bona fide permanent job. She did not PASS GO or COLLECT $200. She was fired unjustly and returned to the temp pool.

So forgive Girl Friday if she hasn’t strapped on her party shoes just yet. She does have a six-month probation to get through…

Party in June!?

After a (shocking) formal job offer made this very afternoon, Girl Friday will take the leap from tenuous employment to The Work Force much sooner than expected. She’ll be joining the Team at the property management office in a “critical” role—according to her HR contact, Mendel.

Mendel’s chipper attitude made the good and the bad news easier to swallow (the good: midrange starting salary; the bad: $450 yearly parking cost). Before reporting to her first day on the job, Girl Friday will sit through four hours of new employee orientation. In the time it would normally take her to catch up on Tivo, Girl Friday will learn workplace jargon like PPO, 403B, and Title IX.

Considering the happy news, Girl Friday is surprisingly stoic. Her excitement barometer has yet to rise—she’s waiting for her probation period to end before she celebrates (party in June!). She isn’t sure if she’ll have access to E!Online, IMDB, or decent coffee. One thing is for sure, Girl Friday’s reign as Superheroine of Small Offices Everywhere is over. Her new division alone is comprised of five hundred cohorts.

While the jury is still out on the announcement, Girl Friday will be trying on new titles for size. How does Superheroine of Reluctant Admin Assistants Everywhere sound?

A bit too perfect…

Hey all! Notice how my last story was a two-parter? Read Part I first, then Part II last!